December 9, 2010

One step backwards...sigh

I spoke too soon.  The weakness took me a step backwards since the last report and I cannot seem to start the post-chemo healing.  My mouth lining and tongue are a total mess.  All those surfaces are rough, feel thick and like leather.  The can food stuff is creating a lot of stomach yuck and constant reflux that burns my mouth like hot acid.  Lieska and I tried to find something....anything...that I could swallow this morning but it turned out to be a humiliating experience as I tried to take each small piece.  I sat in a chair like a blubbering baby trying to take some jello or hard boiled egg whites. I know I will heal up once again soon good enough to go on to the next bag of thrills but I am really sick of this.

Blood lab test results came in yesterday and dashed my last hopes for being allowed to attend my company holiday party Friday for at least a few minutes.  I guess actually every doc and nurse in my world knew that it was out of the question but I kept hoping that I would come out of this last chemo fast enough to have an immune system that could take being close to so many people.  Oh well, I will just plan on having a great time next year...